I've noticed that I have an assortment of difficult people in my life lately. In the recent weeks, I've felt deeply hurt by a so-called friend who photographed my wedding. For those of you who don't know, I was married in August of 2010 to an amazing man, Josh - we still have not received our wedding photos. Needless to say, I'm pretty upset. Josh is extremely frustrated. In my attempts to contact her I've been ignored, forwarded to voicemail and, on several occasions, cussed at and blackmailed (to get money).
The difficult part is I've tried (emphasis on tried) to exhibit trust, love and understanding throughout the past nine months. It's been hard, to say the least. So, what did I do you ask? I prayed. I prayed out of anger and frustration, "God, I don't want to pray for her... I can't - not with a genuine heart. Help me get to a place where praying for her isn't so hard. I don't know what else to do."
Shortly thereafter, Sermons and Scripture starting popping out at me; speaking to me in a way they hadn't before: 1 Samual 12:23, "As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the Lord by failing to pray for you."
The truth is, I had not been praying FOR her - nor had I had any desire to. Yet, motivated by this verse, I began praying... and, I can honestly say, healing has begun in my heart. It's a one-day-at-a-time kind of situation. You just have to keep pushing through each day - don't give up!
The verse, Matthew 5:44 has often been quoted to me, "Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." While most feel encouraged by the merciful words of Jesus, many feel feel resistant when challenged to actually do it. "You want to pray for them? Pray for someone that hurt me so? Did you see what they did to me, what they put me through? I can't... you're asking too much!"
There was once a time I chafed against the very notion; after all, it runs counter to our nature as humans. Genuinely praying for our enemies, literally, seems impossible but when remember that nothing is impossible with God and He often asks of us things that go against our natural way of feeling and thinking.
I know that it is super difficult to do what is asked in the above text, however I am here to encourage you. I've found that I'm better able to handle tough situations when I have support and love (not necessarily from people I know personally).
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